Solly’s

I was waiting in line to get in, finally the door opened and FOUR girls exited this cramped stall, I have no idea what they were doing in there or how they all fit inside. The last one laughed and said to me “there’s still one more to come!”

Anyway, there were a few good words of wisdom on the walls here at Solly’s, DC:

“Protest against the rising of conformity”

“And all the colors mix together to grey, and it breaks her heart” (Dave Matthews lyrics)

“We love them in leather, we love them in lace, we love them best when they sit on our face”

“Beaner sucks wiener”

“If you’re mad about Trump, remember that 2020 is far away”

“Shit on the floor”

And one for the readers out there, “The librarians rule the world”


A return visit to Oki Bowl

I’m in Washington DC this weekend and paid a return visit to the incredible Oki Bowl. Not only is it one of my favourite toilets in the world but it’s also one of my favourite ramen joints ūüćúūüöĹ


DC metro map

A map of DC’s metro system on the walls at the local Hostelling International


18 karat gold toilet

Ladies and gentleman, let me present to you the Holy Grail of toilets! ūüŹÜūüöĹ

“America” by Maurizio Cattelan

Entitled ‘America’ (2016), it’s a fully functional & usable 18 karat gold throne by artist Maurizio Cattelan on display at New York’s Guggenheim museum. This incredible piece had been #1 on my toilet bucket list since I first hear about it around a year ago – finally on a weekend trip to the Big Apple I had my chance.

According to the blurb in the museum guidebook: “This work makes available to the public an extravagant luxury product seemingly intended for the 1 percent. Its participatory nature, in which viewers are invited to make use of the fixture individually and privately, allows for an experience of unprecedented intimacy with a work of art.”

It doesn’t get much better than this. If you happen to be in NYC it’s absolutely worth a visit!¬†ūüėĀ


Ruby Tuesday

A weekend in NYC begins with a greasy brunch at Ruby Tuesday


Ottobar graffiti

On the way back to the train station I managed to duck into Ottobar for a quick peek at their impressive floor-to-ceiling graffitied restrooms. Now this is a cool room to relieve yourself in.

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Thanks Baltimore for the¬†stupendous shitters – I really wish I had more time to spend here, one day wasn’t enough. I might be back one day…


Toilet gardens at the Papermoon Diner

One of the top suggestions for restrooms to visit in Baltimore was the Papermoon Diner in Remington. I really didn’t know what to expect here and was quite humoured to see such a colourful & unique building upon my approach:

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Imagine my delight when I came across these numerous toilet gardens littered around the outer grounds of the diner:

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A few bonus pics of the wacky interior:

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Seriously, the Papermoon is one of the most interesting and unique venues I’ve eaten at across all of North America. I’m so happy it came up as a suggestion¬†on Reddit cause I never would have known to come here otherwise.


The Charmery

Named a finalist in this year’s¬†America’s Best¬†Restroom contest, I simply had to pay a visit to¬†Baltimore¬†ice creamery The Charmery to see its colourful aquatic-themed toilet for myself.

While I was there I tried a scoop of their goat cheese honey walnut – good stuff

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Vulgar toilet at the Cat’s Eye

I was a few beers in by now and decided to pace myself by ordering a Sprite at the Cat’s Eye, to which the barmaid scoffed and refused to accept payment presumably out of sympathy.

The self-named Shit House Wall Of the Cat’s Eye Pub was brilliantly vulgar – one of the best I’d come across in ages – featuring poetry and other such¬†words¬†of wisdom including:

You Cunt

You Prick

Pig Fucker

While Your Reading This Your Probably Pissing On Your Shoes
(yes, somebody had corrected the your’s)

Eat Shit. 50 Trillion Flies Can’t Be Wrong

Snow On The Mountain, Smokes In The Grass
Old Man Died With A Cob In His Ass
Cob Fell Out And Wind Blew In
Old Man Came To Life Again

Shit Fuck Ass Turd

Tittys Tittys Tittys

There Was A Young Queen From Bulgaria
Whose Pussy Got Hairier And Hairier
Till The King From Peru
Stopped By For A Screw
Had To Hunt For Her Cunt With A Terrier

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 Now go rinse your eyes out with soap


Bertha’s old school urinal

An old-school monster of a urinal at Bertha’s in Baltimore’s Fells Point. What a bulky¬†piece of equipment this thing is.

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A humorous sign for punters to read while they piss:

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